We are not perfect. It is easy enough to say and we get told enough times, yet truly realizing that and being okay with others realizing that is something else entirely. I want to be perfect. I think that is a normal human reaction to life. We want to live as much as we can and give as much as we can and find perfection in our own ways. We will inevitably fail, yet striving for it nonetheless is the human condition.

I struggle with putting too much pressure on myself. I fail to recognize my success for as long as, perhaps, I should. The result is the need to do more. I want to live countless lives in one. I want to see everything, touch the hearts of as many people as possible. I want to live to live, not live to die.

I received an email from a very special person, someone who came with me on the artist retreat I hosted in the UK. In the sweetest, most motherly way possible, she told me that she worries about me. That she can see my energy drain by the end of the day. And she wants me to take care of myself. This sentiment is echoed by the friends in my life everyday, my family, and yet I ignore it as though a stranger were telling me my shoe is untied: Sorry sir, I’m late to an appointment. No time to tie it back up.

Life is such an interesting balance of contentment and restlessness. We strive to be content with what we have, yet we constantly search for more. We want to find happiness, yet when we have it, we know there is more out there. Life is an addiction that I love with all my heart. I believe it is to be cherished, yet also looked after. The decisions I find myself making, albeit for all the right reasons, aren’t always the healthiest for myself.

I need to slow down, this I know. I will burn out. My health will get worse. Yet I feel that burning desire to explore, adventure, inspire and be inspired. I am going to be on the road more than I will be home for the rest of this year, and I have more planned for the next. My point in writing all of this is not to say that I need to stop, nor even that I necessarily need to slow down in everything I do. I simply need to be more honest.

I need to find an honest place with myself and be able to share that with others. If someone asks me how I’m doing, I will always say wonderful. Because I am. I consider my well-being to be almost exclusively mental. I will answer that question with how I am feeling in my heart, not my body. And I believe that way of thinking is paramount to my personal happiness.

So this is me being honest with you. I am not always in good health. In fact, usually not. And to be honest, I don’t really care. I love experiencing life the way I do. It makes me that much more grateful when I can get out of bed and when I can push past my struggles. But next time I see you, and we ask how the other is doing, I might not be feeling so great. But inside, I’ll be the happiest girl in the world. So when I say I am wonderful, that is the most honest answer I can give.

Live in a world of gratitude, love and happiness.

How are you doing?

The people I’ve met have shaped how I see the world and what opportunities come my way; the places I’ve been have shown me new opportunity and perspective; and the things I’ve invested in have helped to push me into a career I love.

Within the confines of these three categories I can easily see the path I’ve carved for myself, and I want to share which decisions have been most helpful.

PEOPLE

Are the people in your life good for you?

Just like food and exercise, you need the people you surround yourself with to lift you up and support you. Those who do not, might not be worth having around. It is easy to assume that we are victims in this situation (please note sometimes we certainly are), when in fact we often have the power to change our circumstance. The moment we realize that, it becomes our task to make the change.

I have struggled with being used and letting people take advantage of me, and that is only my fault – for not saying no, for not surrounding myself with better people. We must all learn what kind of people we are first, and then find others who will support that.

PLACES

Where are you located? What types of places do you like to be? These things have a huge impact on happiness. I lived in LA for a long time yet I am not a city girl. I wanted so badly to move yet never did anything about it. I always felt like I was supposed to be there, until I realized I could go anywhere and make that my home. I was afraid to leave my friends and afraid that the opportunities in LA would not follow me elsewhere. But wherever you build your life is where your heart is, and opportunities will follow.

When you travel somewhere, remember to be genuinely grateful to be there. I travel a lot, and one thing that I avoid like the plague is to become complacent. Anytime you see a new location, be it exotic or an hour from your home, remember the beauty of this amazing planet.

Everything is amazing, even the things that don’t seem very amazing. I was recently in Kolkata, India and I went to visit Garbage Mountain…literally all of the city’s trash piled up into a monstrous mound. Some of the things I witnessed there were smoking piles of feces, a graveyard of dead dogs, and every other manner of trash you can imagine. It saddened me above all else, but I did not let the experience escape without finding inspiration in it. The world can produce change.

Everything is an adventure. Anytime I travel anywhere, even if I walk around the block, I remember that anything could happen. I try to make everything that I do into an adventure. I narrate stories in my mind as I walk, drive to places I’ve never been on a whim, and treasure every little thing I see. I try to store it all in my mind as inspiration. The way you see the world is the only thing separating one person from another.

THINGS

We must be careful of THINGS, as too many of them can cloud our judgement of what we need vs. what we want. Never make the mistake of thinking you need the latest equipment. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that MORE will make you BETTER.

I am happiest when I give to others, and I create my best art when I am happy. So I try to give as much as I can.

When I find myself focusing on things I give myself a slap on the wrist since I never want to become materialistic. However, there are certain things that I’ve invested in that have made business possible as well as living a more passionate lifestyle.

Be honest about what you want. Five years ago I moved to Los Angeles knowing that I didn’t want to be there. I was up for adventure and wanted to make films, but knew that I was not a city girl in any way. When that move happened I was honest with myself about where I saw myself living for the long haul. When I realized that I didn’t need to be in LA for business, I moved my family to a very small town with beautiful nature all around. My goal was to buy a house, and even though the house itself was not necessary for success, it was a great goal to work toward and huge investment in happiness.

Be honest about what you need. As a photographer, I hear constantly from other people that they absolutely need something to be successful. This lens, that camera, a new computer, etc…I have been guilty of this, too. But the truth is that we so often need very little. Yes, to be a photographer we need cameras. That is a necessary investment. But never mistake wants for needs. That kind of mistake will only bring disappointment when the equipment refuses to be creative for you.

How do you place value on PEOPLE, PLACES, and THINGS?
What might you need to work on?