Adapt, change, learn, grow…OR ELSE. That is what this July challenge is warning me every day. Today my alarm went off and I was perky, ready to start my hour drive to my location. I could hear it was raining, and when I checked the weather saw it would be worse where I was going. I love shooting in the rain, but my car doesn’t do well driving in it, so I opted for a safer location today. That meant I was up at 4am with no where to go for an hour, so I bided my time by thinking up a new concept, finishing off my emails, and making a to do list for the day. Of course I couldn’t stop myself from leaving early (I’m not good at waiting), so I found myself in the middle of no where in the dark with only the little bunnies to keep me company (which was plenty good for me). I am chronically early. It’s pretty bad.

A little bit of panic sets in when you’re a planner and you’ve got a plan and then something shatters it. I plan to the extreme. I’m really good at being spontaneous, as long as it is within my set parameters. Location: check. Photo idea: check. Spontaneous dip in freezing cold water? Check, as long as my plan has gone accordingly thus far. This morning I did my best not to panic, as I have done all month. I might not seem like it (or maybe I do, who can really judge how they come off to people?), but I tend to be a terrible mix of messy/disorganized and Type A planner. When I do something, I do it all the way. Unfortunately for my cleanliness, sometimes I don’t do it at all. All or nothing. I try to learn balance, but ‘black and white’ always catches up with me again.

So, when it’s 4am and you realize your grand plan isn’t going to work, how do you adapt? How do you change what you emblazoned in your mind? How do you quickly get far enough away from that idea to cultivate a new one?

That was my morning question which thankfully I’ve discovered ways of answering very quickly. I practice, every single day, new ways of being mindful and in tune with my inspiration. The more I touch what inspires me by setting my imagination on fire with it, the easier I can reach for ideas of what to create faster. I practice that. Every day.

Today was foggy and mysterious. It was gorgeous. I love the rain and the fog, so I am always in a battle: Do I live somewhere rainy for my art, or somewhere sunny for my happiness? Happiness always wins, and I live in a very sunny place, which is why I get so excited when it rains. We had a huge storm yesterday with a power outage for a couple hours. An excuse for me to read and slow down. I probably needed it. Today was wet and muddy and the birds were singing despite the damp. I felt right at home.

I had the most perfect morning imaginable. I really mean that, even more than other days that I say the same thing (what can I do, I’m an eternal optimist.). I awoke early from a nightmare at 3:45am so I decided to make use of my extra 15 minutes and drive out early to scout. I went about 45 minutes away to find a beautiful forest. As I walked through the trees a family of elk grazed in a nearby field. It was blue out. I felt like the only human for miles. I was completely at peace.

My mind wandered through the forest to the farthest reaches of my imagination and back again as I took a moment to lay quietly on the ground. An ant crawled up my hand and back down again, and I let the tickle linger before wiping it away and going back to my equipment that lay a few feet away. As I set myself up for a portrait I noticed the absence of something. The anxiety that is ever-present in me, be it big or small, was gone. I wasn’t thinking of how much time I had or if my idea was good. Where it would have been there was only calm.

Portrait finished, I began setting up for video. I knew only that I wanted a loose narrative and to learn slow motion. I spent the evening before reading forums and tinkering with my camera until I felt certain I could achieve what I wanted. As I began filming I let the narrative take over and lead myself to different parts of the woods, each shot becoming what it wanted to be. I never forced it. I became it.

I hope your day is as kissed by the sun as mine has been. I’m quite proud of today’s content, and for that I am grateful. Day 8, I love you.