“I was told the other day that I should start to produce some other art: being aware of not getting to comfortable with my style, that I am always doing dark stuff and should do something else. I would assume that you have faced a similar comment in your career and was wondering if you could share you’re opinion on this question – either in a future blog post or here.”

That email got me thinking about criticism, but specifically how frequently people seem to tell artists what to do with their work. I really like the relationship between artist and public, if we could call it that, which social media provides. I welcome all feedback – good or bad – and try to learn how to receive it with grace. However, I’ve only gotten to that point by being able to understand a few things about myself and my creative process.

1. Understand what YOU like about your art. Be able to define that for yourself, be it in a string of words or in an artist statement.

2. Understand WHY you are creating art you are creating.

3. Understand that for each opinion, there is an opposite opinion. Listen to your own.

4. Growth is a natural part of the human experience. We grow and change as we feel the need. If you are holding yourself back out of fear, you know it. Change it. If you are truly happy with your work, keep going. Happiness is key.

5. For each friend lost, a potential is gained. The same is true of internet followers. Do not let your art be dictated by the opinions of others.

6. What is the goal of your art for yourself, and what experience do you want to give to others? My goal personally is to create worlds I wish I could live in. If I feel that way when I picture is completed, I have succeeded. My goal is to get others to question something about the world or themselves by seeing something different to everyday life. I do not get to decide if I have succeeded on that front.

7. Art is interactive. If you are sharing your art, you are inviting opinions. Let them come. Others interacting with your art create something even more special.

Have you ever faced a problem with criticism?
How do you deal with criticism?

Thank you Gabriel Isak for the email and for creating such incredibly beautiful art!

Model (top right): Olivia Clemens
Model (bottom left): Kate Berman

I feel very fortunate for growing up in a house where creativity was not just encouraged but rewarded. I grew up writing magical stories and children’s books and poetry, and then when I “grew up” some more I went to college and studied filmmaking and literature, both completely scary degrees to have in the “real world” but they made me happy. In all of this time my parents never tried to persuade me otherwise. I heard the typical murmurings of how little money I’d be able to make with those degrees, but my mom would always respond by saying “Then you don’t know my girl…”, and so I felt validated.

When photography came into my life in a big way, I had a lot to consider. There were people telling me that it was unwise to jump so wholeheartedly into something as slippery as photography. They said I would never know where my paycheck would come from, and questioned me about specific money-making plots. I was both critical about that way of thinking but also practical, and for a time I answered all of those questions and did so with fervor until I realized that it was no one’s business but my own (literally). I owed nothing to anyone. It was of no one else’s concern where my paychecks would come from or how it would work, save for my husband who is a part of me.

It is so easy to get caught up in other people’s opinions. And depending on our lifestyles, we may never have lived outside that opinion bubble. I know that I was quite sheltered growing up, and that wasn’t because of my parents, it was because of me. I liked being sheltered and having the same people around me and being close to what I knew. My sister was the opposite, completely free-spirited and wild. Because I preferred living life that way back then, I only knew the opinions of those around me. I didn’t understand enough about life.

But when photography came around something shifted. I understood, almost instantly, what was at stake. It wasn’t that no one approved of my photography; on the contrary, they were very supportive. It was that, logistically, they were truly concerned for my well-being if I quit my steady job and went into…the arts. (said with suspenseful music in the background).

I suddenly had a passion so strong that doing anything but photography felt as though it would kill my spirit, and I value that above most else. So I did quit my job, and it took a lot of long conversations with those I cared about, and zero conversations with those who it wasn’t worth having.

When I began exploring different themes in my work, I would hear feedback about the content of my images. They are too dark. They are too creepy. There is too much nudity. This and that and no one could always be happy. But the thing is this: I was always happy. I was creating what I loved, which is no concern of anyone else. I think that we often forget that just because someone has an opinion, that opinion is not fact. It does not need to govern your life.

This can be exceptionally difficult when it comes to loved ones. For example, I met my husband when I was 16. We’ve been together ever since. He and I are joined in every way I can think of and when he has an opinion, I listen to it because I respect him. It can be difficult to understand when to take someone’s opinion to heart and I think one basic question needs to be asked: is your relationship worth sacrificing for the art? Some people are worth losing over this debate. That is plain and simple, and I don’t mean it in any negative way. There are people that bring us down in the world, people who we are better off without. We need not be friends with everyone, and it is best to surround yourself with those who will lift you up.

You are the only one in control of your happiness. If art makes you happy, you have a duty to perform. To keep that locked inside is a disservice to your well-being and to all of those who you might inspire. Art is rarely kept to oneself. These days it is shared, and because of that, inspiration is everywhere. Take what you love and share it. Others will love it simply because you do. And remember above all else that your opinion should be regarded at the highest level. It is not up to anyone else to inspire you, motivate you, encourage you, or support what you do; you need to believe in yourself first. And when you believe in yourself, others are sure to follow.

We become scared to share our work with others because we fear we will have to answer to someone about why we create, or how we create, or about the decisions that went into creating. It is a wonderful to know these things for ourselves, but we never have to answer to anyone about why we do what we do. That is personal and no one can demand the answers of us.

I personally love sharing the why especially. I don’t like laying out a whole story necessarily about the meanings behind the image, but I do love sharing my inspirations and thoughts behind my pictures. That does not mean, however, that I like to defend myself. I love for people to have their own opinions. I think it’s quite interesting when someone dislikes a picture, just the same as when someone likes it. And the reason I feel that I can separate myself from critique is because I understand that I don’t have to answer to anyone.

Opinions are not fact, yet so often we take them as such. We allow the thoughts of others to penetrate our own and suddenly we believe them as though they are fact. This is something that happens to most people at one time or another. It has happened to me. I’ve never met someone who this hasn’t happened to. And it is no one’s fault in particular. If we only blame those who use negativity as a driving force in their lives, we are no better.

We must understand that how we perceive and react to a situation is under our control. Someone may not like what you do. Someone may criticize what you do. Someone may say something mean about what you do. Yet that does not mean that we must take all of those things at face value.

If we understand that we do not have to answer to anyone else…if we understand that we can choose to react in any way we want to a situation…if we understand that our own opinions should be held at a higher standard…then we might be able to break free of those things that hold us back in creating our art.

It is good to be confident in what you do – to like it and feel the power in it. Because even though we can all grow and learn, we should understand that where we are right now is a great place to be: moving forward and taking control of our circumstance. So tell me, what do you love about what you do? Leave a comment letting me know, and a link to your work if you’d like to share.

Own it! Be confident in your craft. Know your worth and find solace in it. And remember that it is a great thing to understand why you create, but that you never have to share that with anyone but yourself.

*I love exploring the dark side of my imagination and I am resolved that if an image is too dark for someone’s taste, I will not apologize. I will recognize the difference between us and appreciate our uniqueness.*