When you really begin doing charity work, you start to realize something that just about anyone who has ever given philanthropically will come to realize: it is never enough. There is always more to do, or a more effective way of doing it. There is always a bigger issue or someone in more need or someone less selfish to do the giving. The problems are always deeper than originally thought, much more complicated, and require huge thinking shifts to occur to be properly solved. What can I do? Who am I to be helping? Is this good or is this just making the problem worse?

You will ask yourself those questions if you are giving with purpose. You will realize that you are so small compared to the problems of the world. You will grapple with the social responsibility of your actions. You will wonder if what you are doing is worth it.

I’m on a trip to Thailand and India currently. I will be gone for almost one month to teach self-portraiture and self-expression workshops to survivors of human trafficking. That sentence alone will bring me praise. Someone will read this and write to me and tell me how amazing the work I’m doing is, and I won’t pretend that it doesn’t make me feel good. What needs to happen though is checks and balances, a true and honest look into the work we, and I, do to try and make the world better.

I have struggled on this trip, more than before, with the question of if what I am doing is truly helping others, or if it is self-serving. I know that it is both, logically, as most actions we partake in are. What are the long-term effects? Are there meant to be long-term effects? I am not solving the world hunger issue, stopping animal abuse, or truly rescuing someone from being trafficked. I am trying to heal with the love and self-awareness I have.

Part of my struggle is learning how much deeper the problem is. I returned from Thailand a couple of days ago and felt both uplifted and downtrodden from the trip. It was incredible – beautiful, adventurous, hard-working, emotional. It was also eye-opening. One of my great passions is animal welfare. If you know me you know that this is something I am unwavering on and I live a lifestyle fully committed to ending the use of animals for our personal gain. Being in Chiang Mai, a region that largely makes it’s money on elephant tourism, showed me the depth of the struggle. You see a “sanctuary” and learn it isn’t a sanctuary at all. You see elephants chained and made to blow into sound-making machines for entertainment and realize that it is better than other tour companies letting their tourists ride in baskets on their backs. You see their ears torn up from hooks digging into their skin and realize that the tradition goes too far back to stop it right now.

Why do I bring this up, if I am there to help young women and not elephants? Because being a philanthropist does not mean doing work in the area of your expertise and turning a blind eye to anything that doesn’t fall directly under your jurisdiction. If we see injustice, shouldn’t we speak about it?

I met the most inspiring person while visiting the Mae Wong region outside of Chiang Mai, Thailand. Her name is Alexa. She went to Thailand to help at-risk girls from being trafficked. She opened a small resort and uses the money she makes from tourists staying at her establishment to pay for housing, food, and education for rescued girls. She speaks out against those who would mistreat any living being. She puts her life on the line for what she believes in. Certainly we won’t all go to the lengths Alexa has to stop the injustice we see, but what can we do?

It is too easy to see all of the corruption and say that there is nothing we can do, or nothing effective enough, or nothing long-lasting enough. I called my husband when I was feeling really sad about the elephants and all the people who still need help in Thailand and I said: “Maybe I should just come home. Maybe I’m not doing enough good here.” He told me what I already knew in my heart. He told me that all I can do is try, and that trying is so much more than what too many do, which is to turn a blind eye.

I’m back in India now. Today I begin a workshop for women who have aged out of the sex-trafficking trade. I have never worked in this capacity before and I am nervous. I am nervous that I won’t say anything useful, that I won’t be able to relate, that they will be uninterested. I am scared. I am hesitant. But this is what I have learned:

You can never know the impact you have on someone, so you might as well try.

You can never know how lives will be changed because of your actions, so do.

You can never know how the inspiration of doing will inspire others to try.

The cycle is a beautiful one. All we can do is try. All we can do is find our unique gift and give it freely. It might not help everyone. It might not solve the world’s problems. I may not be able to free the elephants or rescue all of those in need. I may not have a gift that everyone needs to receive. But I will still give it. I will still give it. No, the actions we take are rarely enough. I will continue to question these experiences. It will never be enough, but it is something and I would take something over nothing any day.

—

How can you help Alexa? Purchase gifts from Daughter’s Rising, her organization that aids trafficked or at-risk girls.

This image has been one of my best selling prints and most “iconic” image that I’ve ever created. Somehow, it crept into being and stayed around, remaining a symbol to me and to many others of the standard of my work. And it has been a gift, truly, to create an image that I loved and was noticed by others. Yet in everything we do, create, and become, there is a time to move on. Next year I’ll be producing work that is slightly different, much more meaningful to me, and more detailed. I love this work. I love the work that I create because it is me – it is where my mind was wandering in a particular corner of my little universe. I also love to move on – to metaphorically shatter that place and build something new from the pieces. I hope that you’ll be on that journey with me.

So, to break from the past and pay it forward, I am offering this dress as today’s giveaway. It is my favorite dress. I bought it in 2010 at a sale outside of a vintage store. It was crumpled up in a box that had a big $5 sign on it. And when I saw it, I knew I would be inspired for years to come. I have been, and still am, but feel changes brewing inside. My heart tells me it is the right time to let it go.

This has been my biggest lesson of 2015:

When we hold on to what makes us feel safe, we lose our greatest opportunities.
When our imaginations become reality, it is time to explore another corner of the mind.
When we limit ourselves by what we know is well liked, or what who we think we are, we may never find our greatest potential. 

What has been your biggest lesson of 2015?

Share in the comments for a chance to win this dress and my heartfelt thanks. My love, gratitude, and deepest adoration go out to you this year and as we enter a new chapter. Thank you for being you.

Peace and joy,
Brooke

PS: Here are some other uses of this dress!

I started the year 2015 in India. January. Kolkata. I found myself back where I always end up, a difficult place to be but so filled with love and warmth. I taught my third workshop there benefitting survivors of human trafficking. I ended my trip at an orphanage in a small village outside of the city. I waved goodbye to the boys and girls, two of whom knocked on our door at night to sit and giggle on our bed, singing traditional Bengali songs while we looked on in awe, unable to find a single song to sing in return save for Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.

There are so many moments that shape who a person is and becomes. I looked out of the car that was taking us to the train station at the children, all of them reaching their little hands into the open window for one last goodbye, and that moment struck me. I felt as though I was watching someone else through the dusty window of the old vehicle, like time was moving so slowly and the huge smile on my face frozen in time.

Another moment was in March, on my birthday, when I was supposed to be teaching a class at WPPI. Instead I was in the hospital from food poisoning, made worse because of my Fibromyalgia. I was unable to walk by myself and couldn’t get out of bed to get to my class. I cried when my friends left for a time. I posted online about how sorry I was, and expected backlash because I had to miss my own class…the one I baked a cake for and everything. But nothing bad happened. Instead, I saw the kindness of this community. I received well over a thousand comments and messages and emails with healing vibes, and I harnessed them all so I could share my birthday cake with everyone the next day. Moments like that stay with you.

April came. I was desperate for adventure. I wanted to do something uncomfortable and exciting. I went camping despite the weather being at 20 degrees F. We froze all night. My best friend woke me every half hour to ask if I saw something moving outside the tent. At five AM we packed up and went to a nearby lake, and I jumped in. It took every ounce of energy and mental control I had. I have never been in colder water than that. And it was entirely worth it. To summon your energy and find the strength to say yes instead of no, that is why I do these things to myself.

In May I found myself sitting with a dead bird in an old chateau in France. I cradled it; a small bird in my small hands. I had no idea what I was going to create, but I wanted to honor the bird’s life. And so I did create – whatever felt natural, whatever felt right. “The Weight of a Feather”, I titled it, and it felt like it was supposed to be. I wafted through the countless rooms of the castle with my new friends, each of them offering to help in different ways, each of them showing their support to someone they had just met days before. And it felt like family. I felt like I was home. And I felt like I, finally, listened to my heart.

Later that month I went to Iceland. The hour was midnight and all four of our RVs pulled up to the glacier lagoon. Some of us were tired. Others were excited. Most of us were a mix of both. We got out and stared at the blue icebergs floating, quietly, in the blue water. The blue sky turning from slate gray to purple from time to time, clouds wandering in and out of my gaze. It took us time to get our bearings. And once I saw the spot that I had been dreaming of, the one I had conjured up in my imagination of what Iceland would look like, I put my blue dress on. I slipped into a pair of plastic waders to keep dry, and I set my camera up for a self-portrait. I wandered into that icy water, playing down how scared I was, and I focused my mind. Just create. Just breathe. Just feel. And I did. All 18 of us took pictures as I glided into the water, stumbling every now and then over the uneven terrain of the water’s floor. And I posed, back-bending, lightly touching the water, head up to the sky, exactly as I felt in that moment. Alive. Whole. Fulfilled.

In June I was in Australia entirely by myself. I didn’t know a single person. After I gave a lecture, I invited anyone who wanted to join out on a photo shoot at the Secret Garden. The next morning that group of us showed up ready to have an adventure, and so we did. The mud was up to our knees in places, and I decided I would throw caution to the wind and despite my better judgment, I let all of my outfits get covered in mud for the sake of adventure (and later, the nicest woman would take all of those muddy clothes and wash them in her machine at home so I wouldn’t have to hand-wash them in my bathtub at my hotel). We took pictures, gave hugs, laughed until our stomachs hurt, and made friends. By the end of it a girl called Laura came to join us. She had driven 3 hours to be there and just caught us at the end. I was covered in mud from head to toe, literally. She asked if she could help model, and within seconds was rolling in a mud puddle. We embraced in a hug and afterwards, the group of us went out to eat lunch like we’d been old friends for as long as we could remember.

Fast forward to October. My life was changed forever. I hosted my first convention. Trying to use words to describe it would be too time consuming, so I’ll say this: I was supported in ways I never thought I would be. I was challenged in ways I never imagined. I was changed in ways I did not expect. And every single part of it was a dream come true.

November. Back to India. “Right back where we started from”. And it was a full circle. After over two years of fundraising and jumping through hurdles, I opened The Light Space, photography school for survivors of human trafficking and abuse with my partners Laura Price of Blossomy and Urmi Basu of New Light Kolkata. The inauguration started as I spoke to the students. They wanted to learn. They wanted a different life. They saw their future, the possibility of it all. And I knew, beyond a doubt, that the work had been worth it. My dear friend Amy Parrish came with me to dedicate 4 months of her time to educating the students. Cameras and lenses and computers were all donated and our little school grew wings.

There were so many moments this year that impacted me. Meeting 100 creatives in London. Speaking at different venues. Swimming at sunrise in France. Vacationing in Spain. Quiet mornings writing my novel. Portfolio reviews. Building a set. Making videos. A photo shoot at the ancient temples in Cambodia. Bathing with elephants in Thailand. Watching my family grieve as my aunt passed away. My husband’s dedication to our fulfillment. My sister moving to be closer to me.

Endless.

And so I ask you…

What moments impacted you the most from 2015?

When you share your most impactful moments from 2015 in the comments below, you will be automatically entered to win a giveaway of this dress that you see in the cloud/space image!

I am weirdly sentimental toward this dress, and it is today’s GIVEAWAY! I got it a couple of years ago and wore it to events, notably the Project Imagination red carpet. I then proceeded to abuse it beyond reason in a multitude of different photo shoots, including some of my personal favorite images. It is time to send it off to a new home though, tattered and worn as it may be. Leave a comment below to be entered into the drawing!

Love & Peace!

I looked at the calendar and suddenly realized that we only have 3 days left until 2016! And as I thought about if I would have any regrets this year, the only thing I could think of was to spend my last few 2015 days giving to others. In that spirit, these next three blog posts will be dedicated to giving.

Each day I will choose one person from the comments to receive a care package from me, including a costume from my collection, a hand-written note, and a little something extra to brighten your new year.

These are the main ways that I chose to give back this year.

1. Made donations to campaigns. Some of them include a campaign to end gender-based violence, and another was to help a small village in Uganda plant ginger to grow a sustainable income.
2. Donated time to a cause I care about. I spent time at Best Friends Animal Sanctuary this year to help rescue and take care of animals in need.
3. Initiative. I started a photography school in India called The Light Space to benefit survivors of human trafficking abuse.
4. Donated prints to various charities. One was to a print auction for the foundation BeyondBlue – the money goes to helping people who suffer from anxiety and depression to help prevent suicide.
5. Created educational content. I love releasing videos so much! And in doing so, I can only hope that they have been helpful for someone in some way.

But we’re entering a new year. A new phase. This is how I want to give back next year:

1. Start a new section of this blog dedicated to making it easy and efficient for YOU to donate your SERVICES to raise money for a cause I care about deeply. We don’t all have money to spare for any cause we care about, and I want to make it possible for anyone to support a charity.
2. Donate 5 prints next year to important charitable causes.
3. Conduct 3 photography workshops to children in hospitals to help empower them to tell their stories.
4. Visit at least two animal sanctuaries to give my time to those adorable little creatures.
5. Create more educational content for free.

To enter the giveaway to receive a free COSTUME + Surprise, just leave a comment below answering…

How are you going to give back next year?

Have you been able to give back this year?

This is the dress that I’ll be giving away for today’s contest! Winner will be chosen at random and notified by 12pm PST on Wednesday, December 30th. This dress is actually more purple/maroon but can very easily be changed to a vibrant red (or almost any other color!) in Photoshop if need be. It flows really nicely and I’m quite sad to see it go, as I’ve been using it to shoot with for the past 3 years! Time to give someone else a chance to play!

Love and hugs!

“I’m going to jump in there,” I told myself.

The day before these things always seem like a grand idea, the type that happens in movies but rarely in our real lives. A fantastic gesture, a willingness to take hold of your own destiny. Movie characters amaze us in this way. We strive to be more like them, but rarely do we go through with it.

I wondered why I was doing this. I wondered if it was really worth it. I wondered why I ever put my self through these situations. Yet still, I set up my camera, put a beautiful dress on, and steadied my breathing. I didn’t want to jump in that water. I had no desire in that moment to do it. And that is precisely why I knew I had to.

And so I jumped…or rather, waddled awkwardly across the rocks that stood in my way at the shoreline. And when I got to where I wanted to take a picture, I sat down in the water, splashing my way in, and took a deep breath before laying my head back. I was only in that freezing water for a minute, or maybe even less. It was almost too much. It tested me. It pushed my limits. And then I was out, getting back to dry land as fast as I could, the first rays of sun just barely kissing the mountain peak in the distance.

Even after we drove away and left the lake behind us my toes were still burning from the cold, and I thought, at first, that I didn’t enjoy the experience. I don’t like jumping in cold water. But then again, that was never the point. The point was not to enjoy myself or to feel good or to buy into another guilty pleasure. The point was to create an adventure, to push myself, and to do something that I would remember. All of those things happened. And in doing so, my definition of who I am as a person expanded. Suddenly I was who I had been, and now I was more, too.

If I had slept in that morning, not gone camping the night before, and waded blindly through my morning routine, would I have been fundamentally changed? Probably not. But now, because I created an adventure, I wrote new lines in the story of my life that are worth reading. And I am a better person for it.

I challenge you to go jump in some water – any time of day, any body of water – be as creative as you like. Video tape yourself and share that video with me, and if I receive 50 video submissions I will donate $100 to one of the charities listed on this site in the Giving Back section.
Use the hashtag #PassionPlunge.

When it came time to do the class, I nearly forgot that it was nighttime! I was envisioning everything being lit by a window. So instead of panicking with 20 minutes to spare before class, I once again nagged the Sweetlight team and asked if they could put one light with a softbox above the subject, pointing directly down. Everyone looked at me like I was nuts…which I might be, but in my mind, I wanted to simulate a moon. So I figured the best way to do that would be to put the light overhead and diffuse it.

Once the light was set the class gathered, and we began building. We started with a simple setup: dirt on the floor (thank you WHCC!), a black backdrop, and our model Marsha laying on top. I put a lantern in her hand and made it look like a forest scene with a girl who had fallen asleep under the night sky.

From there we began adding leaves, and then sticks, and then eventually a bed.

(I should definitely say thank you to the hotel for providing the bed, though I actually think they still have no idea that we covered it in dirt and sticks, so probably best to not mention it…).

My method was to build the scene up, starting with something simple and ending in a crescendo of a beautiful dream sequence – a girl dreaming in the forest at night, still sleeping in her bed. It was probably the most fun I’ve had teaching as far as the actual shooting goes…and to imagine, it was all in a ballroom at a hotel with one light and a black background. That is why I love photography. You can make it whatever you want, your dreams can become a reality, and you can do it with your own rules.

If you’d like to purchase this print to support the Saving Eliza charity, you can do so here!

If you had a blank space, how would you decorate it?

1) I realized I had way too many dresses compared to the amount of closet space (case in point, the trunk of my car has become extra storage).

2) I realized I could raise a little more money for the school I’m helping to create in India (watch the video about it below!) if I sold some of those dresses.

VIEW THE COSTUMES ON EBAY!

If you’d like to bid on any of these, all money is going to the school and I would be so appreciative. And my husband would be too, because he would like possession of the closet space back.

If anyone else has a costume or prop that you’d like to sell for the charity, you can link to your Ebay below so others can find it. That’d be super awesome! The school needs all the help it can get. Or if you’d care to make a private donation, email me through my website and I can give you all the info for non-profit donations.

<3

Art Gallery AFK: Staging and Revelation, Group Show
Lisbon, Portugal
March 7-April 12

This show is going to be an absolute delight, this I already know…and I’m definitely not talking about my own work, but the work of so many artists that I adore, like Daria Endresen. I wish I could go…I’d be totally starstruck!!!

Harrington Street Arts Centre: IF I COULD FLY
Kolkata, India
March 7-12

Completely near to my heart, this is, finally, the exhibition of the pictures I shot in India last year featuring the women from the shelter home benefiting survivors of human trafficking. Also featured are the self-portraits the women did to tell their own stories through art. I will be attending this exhibition and doing a live self-portrait demo as well.

The Project Room, Group Show
Chicago, IL
March 1-31

I’ve had my work in The Project Room for the last year and now we’re collaborating on a group show for the month of March. I really love this gallery and I wish I could be there in person! I have two pieces represented there and I hope you enjoy them!

A self-sustaining photography school free for survivors of human trafficking.

This is where we hope to have your help and support. The incredible photo community is one of a kind and I believe that if everyone donated just one dollar, the could fund this project. I am so hopeful, nervous to ask, humbled, and eager to see this project off the ground. So many emotions running through my body…so I’ll leave it there. I’ll let the campaign page say it all.

And if we do nothing else today, let’s promote passion in our own lives and in the lives of others.

Donate to the
Photography School for Survivors of Human Trafficking